Yes PJ Harvey, I Will Lick Your Legs

There is a phrase which makes me barf like a 6-year old in a McDonalds playground.  It is “ladies of a certain age”.  Seriously, WTF?  How old are we talking here? 35… 40… 50?

And what does it even mean?  It’s says to me that we are expected to somehow become more dignified, less frivolous and disinterested in the things of our youth.  You know, outrageous things like falling passionately in love with a band or singer; listening to one song over and over so many times the neighbours start knocking on your door; getting so drunk you forget that your hands and feet actually serve different purposes; pulling absurd poses for no good reason other than to amuse yourself & your friends; explosively loud laughter in a public place that makes passers-by frown disapprovingly;  singing & dancing in your loungeroom with your best friend just cos it’s Friday night.

But I love these things.  I can’t be expected to give up such vast chunks of myself just because I found a grey pube for christs sake.*

I will agree to one thing and one thing only.  If A-N-Y-ONE starts discussing my actual age from here on in, I will give you paper cuts all over the fleshy bit on the inside of your upper arm.  I will then proceed to pour a bucket of lemon juice over you.  This refusal to talk numbers will be my only foray into the so-called delicacies of aging.

As to the rest?  Well.  Colour me inapropriate.

There are a few lovely ladies in the public eye (all older than me too – bonus!) who’ve managed to keep their sass regardless of age.

pjharvey cameron_diaz_2009_golden_globe_awards_1.0.0.0x0.400x576 15_Gwen Stefani 37
PJ Harvey Cameron Diaz Gwen Stefani
drew-barrymore meg_white kim-gordon-urban-outfitters-collab
Drew Barrymore Meg White Kim Gordon

Ok perhaps Gwen is a bit of a stretch but I reckon Kim and Polly Jean more than make up for it.

So who do you think still has it?  Pick one of my suggestions or enter your own.  Someone who’s no longer a contemporary in age, of say Beth Ditto (The Gossip); Allison Mosshart (The Kills); Ellen Page (Juno) or Evan Rachel Wood (The Wrestler, Running With Scissors), but still walks around with a swagger that makes sure noone notices.  Vote below!

By the way, did I mention it’s my birthday today?  Hurrah!

* I really don’t have any grey pubes.  It’s called literary license.  Seriously.  When that day comes, you will know.  There will be gnashing of teeth and a great thundering wail.

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2 Responses

  1. Happy birthday big sister. Hope it is well spent and well bent! Enjoy

  2. hmmm… Janeane Garofalo would have been a good one to include… damn!

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